Save My Marriage – Three Steps To Communicating Again

Here’s What You Need…

What you need is every last nitty-gritty detail and insider secret explaining exactly what it takes toget your marriage back on track so you can enjoy it and keep it that way.

Look, if you:

  • Want to fall in love with your partner again…
  • Want your partner to fall in love with you again…
  • Aren’t being respected or heard by your partner…
  • Can’t resolve anything with your partner and your arguments linger…
  • Are frustrated about how much effort you’re putting into your relationship only to be pushed further away from your partner…
  • Can’t understand why spending more time together just seems to push things further downhill..


Dear Reader,

If you are struggling with the question how to save my marriage, you may get the feeling that you are on your own. Especially if your partner is not working on the relationship as hard as you are.

Let me tell you straight away though, that you are not alone. Did you know there are more than 2 million divorces happening every year?

You may ask yourself now, “OK.. how is that supposed to make me feel better?”

Well, look at it this way. Because so many married couples are facing problems these days, there are a great number of professionals who offer their expertise in helping to save those marriages.

Of course the most well-known type of help you can get when trying to save your marriage, is marriage counseling. In some cases, this can be a very effective way to work through the problems that you and your partner are having.

In many cases though, I have seen marriages get even worse because of counseling. Often both parties try to get the counselor to be “on their side”, to get the upper hand in whatever conflict there may be in their marriage. Obviously, this will not be helpful at all, it will only cause more heartache.

Another problem is that you have to get your partner to agree to counseling. If you are the only one working to improve the relationship, it may be difficult to convince the other that counseling is needed.

Apart from that, marriage counseling is expensive. Not everybody is able (or willing) to spend that much money.

A new development in resolving marital problems is looking very promising though. There are now professionals who have bundled their advice in extensive home courses, which are very cheap, and have produced proven results for a broad range of problems that exist in marriages.

A great upside to this as well, is that you don’t have to get your partner to agree to go to counseling. These courses are designed so that you can work on them alone, without your partner even knowing about it. Can you see the power in this yet? You could finally find the answer to your question “how to save my marriage”.. And you can do it on your own!

“How can I save my marriage when we don’t even communicate anymore?” I get asked questions like this often. If you are having serious relationship problems and your marriage is on the brink of divorce, there has almost certainly been a breakdown in trust and communication between you and your partner, especially if infidelity is involved. In this article I will give three steps you can take to begin communicating with your spouse again, even in cases of infidelity.

Step 1: Realize that communication is a skill

It may seem like something that comes natural at birth. However, communication, especially in a relationship, is a skill. As with any skill, communication takes time and practice to be good at it.

Also like any skill, the higher level you are on, the more skill is required. For instance, more skill is required for a college tennis player to be able to compete than is needed in high school. Furthermore, more skill is required out of a professional tennis player to be able to compete than is required out of a college player.

This is true with relationships as well. More communication is required in a marriage than when you are just dating. Furthermore, more communication is required for a marriage to last long-term than when you are first married.

The point of this is that you need to understand that communication is not something that is either there or not; and if it’s not your marriage is doomed. Communication is something that requires some work and commitment from you and your spouse. If you and your spouse have a hard time truly communicating, it is something that can be learned.

Step 2: Promise to each other to be 100% honest

There is one huge stumbling block to communication, and that’s dishonesty. You simply cannot effectively communicate with your spouse if one or both of you is not being honest.

One of the biggest problems with trying to heal a marriage after adultery is getting through trust issues. Whether there was infidelity in your marriage or not, you should both promise to be completely honest with each other from this point forward and let that be the cornerstone of your marriage.

Step 3: Promise to each other to reveal what you are tempted to lie about

There are often things that spouses are hesitant to share with each other. Perhaps it’s just “little white lies” that are uncomfortable to talk about for fear of hurting your spouse’s feelings. Or, again in the case of adultery, it could be something or several things that are more serious.

If you are going to live up to step two and be completely honest with each other, and live up to step one by practicing communication, you are going to need to tell your spouse the things that you are tempted to lie about.

When you find yourself in one of these situations where you are tempted to lie, say to your spouse, “I am tempted to not be completely open and honest with you about this”, and then explain about what and why. It is much better to be open and honest about things than to try to cover them up with dishonesty.

In this article I touched on three steps that are important for opening up the lines of communication again in your marriage. This is by no means a cure all answer to the question, “how can I save my marriage?” However, these three tips are a good first step to begin honest dialog with your spouse again, which is important in the process of saving your marriage.

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